At workshops and other business events, moderators attempt to break the ice amongst the participants with this ominous question: “State your name and reveal one fact about yourself that nobody knows.”
This usually causes cold sweat, heavy allergic reactions, or severe speech impediments. The answers border between the lame and the unimaginative: “I play golf and have a score of XYZ,” “I sing in a country and western band,” or “I do volunteer work in our town.”
But fear no longer! Here are a few answers to this question that will kindle the attention of your fellow participants and the moderator alike, and that will set the stage for the remainder of the event. By using these statements, you will impress your peers!
And off we go: “Hi, my name is Aspen, and a little-known fact about me is that…
- My last employer fired me for theft. No, I don’t want to go into details.
- I probably have more speeding tickets than all of you combined.
- I collect neckties. As a hobby.
- To improve my survival skills, I once jumped naked out of an airplane into the Brasilian rainforest.
- I’m chair of our local BDSM society.
- I start drinking hard liquor at nine in the morning.
- I have an identical twin. We are so much alike, that most people can’t tell us apart.
- I once infiltrated the local nazi chapter.
- I spent several years in jail. In Argentina.
- I’ve shot half a dozen African elephants. And three rhinos.
- I don’t believe in vaccinations and climate change is a hoax.
- The smell of the person on my right is making me vomit.
Naturally, your answer may need to be adjusted to the answers by the other participants; if the other participants claim to have climbed Mount Everest or sailed the Pacific (on a weekly basis), you will need to come up with a stronger position. Remember, you do not simply want to impress, you want to stun them into silence.
- I sing opera, and I am working on my first recording and tour of the great opera houses of the world, the MET, the Scala, Sidney, places like that.
- I once had an intimate relationship with a participant in this workshop (look all of them in the face).
- Yeah, I’ve spent time in jail. Several years. The government doesn’t allow me to speak about the details.
- In my spare time, I’m a militant anarchist.
- I once had to kill a man with my bare hands. In Stockholm.
- In my free time, I’m a taxidermist.
- I participate in the ironman a couple of times a year (statement only works if you are highly overweight).
- I make some dough on the side through drug trafficking.
- I love to sit on the sofa and listen to my tinnitus. It cleanses my soul.
- I beg.
Originally posted 2019-03-30 22:55:00.